Hey kid

Hey kid, pull up a seat, get a load off, put your feet up, chill out, relax, cool down, rest. Please. Yeah… So… Yeah… So you want to marry my daughter, huh? Yes, no, please: lemme finish. You’re a good kid, your dad’s a good golfer and all. But you want my baby, my little girl, that’s a… that’s… you know, it’s not… It’s a… Well, you know what I mean. You’re doing the honorable thing, here, but come on: why so soon? Why now? I mean, look at my wife and I, we… we had ten years of happiness. Pure joy. And then 20 years of misery until that old cunt finally had a stroke and drowned in the hot-tub. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable, really I don’t, but that’s just the way it is, son. Love dies, it doesn’t last. Sure, you’re lucky if you got it and enjoy it while it lasts and all, but when love dies, that’s more painful than getting hit in the balls by a golf club swung by a drunk Jack Nicholson, lemme tell you. I know. Trust me. Really. That’s why we couldn’t have a second kid. But anyway… My baby girl… I don’t know, I mean she’s 23 but I can’t imagine her getting married. I can’t… Well, let me be honest: I can’t imagine her being sexually active. I mean I just shook your hand. Maybe that hand I just shook was in my baby’s pussy recently. No, no, don’t be uncomfortable! I’m being honest, here. That’s what I do: I speak from the heart. But, yeah: imagining your dick in my daughter, I don’t know, it’s… it’s too hard. No pun intended. Okay, how big are you? Come on, don’t be shy, loosen that belt and lemme see your cock. Oh, come on: I was in the army, I’ve seen my share of cocks, don’t be so shy. Come on: drop ‘em. Look, if you don’t drop your pants, I won’t let you marry my baby. Yeah, there you go. So, let’s see… Huh… Good thing I’m wearing my glasses! Ha! Just kidding, relax. Jeez, kid, you ever thought of trimming that foliage? Well… Okay, you know what?... I guess I can imagine your cock in my baby’s pussy, I can live with this thought. I mean: I’m sure she can barely feel it, right? Oh, come on: don’t be like that, we’re men, we’re talking! We’re shooting the shit, just taking it easy! So… tell me… How often do you fuck her? Yes, I’m serious. Do I look like I’m not serious? And for God’s sake, pull your pants back up, what is this, Dicks ‘R’ Us? So... yeah… How often do you have sex with her? Come on, ball-park figure… Yeah? Oh, yeah? That often? Yeah? And do you make her cum? Come on, don’t be shy! Yeah, sure: have a drink. So: do you? Make her cum? Oh, yeah? Good for you. Good for you! You gotta please your woman, trust me. Yeah. Yeah… So… does she blow you? Come on, don’t be like that! Sure, have another drink!... Yeah? She does? Is she good? Yeah? Good, I’m glad she got better. What? No, no, I didn’t mean anything by that. A joke. You know, one of them jokes people say. Just that. Yeah… So, yeah… Let’s have a drink and forget about all of this, huh? Yeah: let’s. Cheers. Let’s go back to the party, what do you say? Yeah, yeah: let’s. Oh, but, uh: before we do, just uh… Well: drop them pants once more. Never mind why, just do it, sonny boy!